Convenient Memory

The mind is a beautiful thing. It’s absolutely amazing how you can conveniently block out certain parts of your life, as if they never even happened. Think of a woman who just gave birth. She has suffered through hours and hours of unimaginable pain, and the minute that baby is put into her arms, the pain is a distant memory, and she’s ready to have five more kids.

That’s kind of what I’ve been going through. I’ve actually been second guessing my mommy gut instinct.  Maybe I am just run down, and maybe this is simply a case of “mind over matter.” I had been feeling almost completely symptom-free and back to myself the last few days. So much so, that I was starting to think that maybe I was just being a big wimp about everything I’ve been going through for the past few months . . . .  until today.  I guess this is what you call a “flare up.” Well, it confirmed without a doubt in my mind, I’m not a wimp. Something is definitely wrong. I am not a hypochondriac. What I am experiencing is very real. 

For documentation purposes, I’m going to do a quick head to toe list of symptoms I’ve had tonight:

– migrane
– teeth sensitivity
– sensitivity to sound & light
– ears ringing
– jaw pain (tooth pain)
– neck, shoulder and back pain
– pins and needles sensation in my arm
–  arthritis pain in my wrist and knee
– pain in my shin
– overall body aches
– muscle spasms (not limited to just one part of my body)

Now, google Lyme disease symptoms . . . . . hhhmmmm pretty similar to what I just listed, right? I get it, I have to follow protocol, Lyme is a very controversial issue in the medical world, but I KNOW that this is what’s going on in my body. And I know that the longer it takes the doctors to start treating it, the more progressive this disease is going to get. 

Again, this whole Lyme journey is so similar to what I went through with the boys and their Autism diagnosis – and my mom with her Alzheimer. We all knew what was wrong. Yet, we had to go through rounds and rounds of tests and evaluations, wasting several years of valuable time for what? To have the doctors tell us, what we already knew all along. 

But in hinds sight, it wasn’t a waste of time. It was God’s plan. If it wasn’t for the struggles I went through with the Autism fight, I would have never known how to be my own Lyme Disease Advocate. But God allowed those things to happen in my life, so I would be strong enough and confident enough in myself, to weather this next storm. And like I always used to say, Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain. So, after my detox bath I’m going out dancing! (better yet, I’ll let the sugar plumbs do all the dancing in my head, while I’m sound asleep).Image

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