It’s been one week today that I started this new round of treatments. I can sum up this past week in one word – WOW! I cannot say it enough or emphasize it enough, but Lyme is the craziest, sneakiest, most mind blowing disease in the history of all diseases! I know I sound like a broken record, but once again I had forgotten how sick I was. My little Lyme buggers must have been hiding deep within the crevices of my cells, because I honestly thought I was close to the finish line. Until . . . . I started three antibiotics a day and my body was thrown into herxing! Words really can’t describe the exhaustion. It really is more like a comatose state than anything else. You really can’t move. You really can’t speak. My words become short syllables that slurred out of my mouth. I fought with every ounce of energy in my body to keep my eyes open, but I lost. My hubby asked if I was okay, I can only shake my head . . . . no, I’m not okay. I picture myself last night curled up on the couch, in the dark, not able to function. And I can’t believe that this is the same person who went to a Kickboxing class just one week ago (and kicked butt, I might add). How is it possible that just a few pills can do this do a person’s body? Not to mention, I woke up feeling perfectly fine. Talk about the physical and mental stress of going through this every few days! It is so hard to comprehend and even harder to explain to someone else who is not going through it. I was at a conference today for work and came across a hospital that was giving away free acupuncture sessions. I LOVE acupuncture! It worked miracles with my pregnancy, with my immune system, with my stress and I know it would help with my Lyme (problem is with $500 dr visits and thousands of dollars in supplements and prescriptions, there’s no money left for anything else). It just so happens that this doctor also has Lyme (God works all things for good) and we were able to share our horror stories and more importantly what helps and what doesn’t. If you recall, the last conference I attended, the booth next to us was selling some sort of chiropractic pulsing/massager that was supposed to cure migraines. It was a blow to my spirits to learn that event this product – worthy of being used in professional chiropractor offices around the world, did not come close to relieving the pain of my migraine. It was then that that I remembered reading an article about Lyme pain, and that the pain that I am feeling isn’t real HEADACHE pain. Lyme is tricking my brain into thinking I’m having a migraine, but I’m really not. Which is why when I try your typical medication or therapy for migraines, I get no relief. Hence – the feeling of hypochondria. So, now I’m sitting here . . . my legs are twitching and spazzing like a doctor is checking my reflexes; the right side of my neck has shooting pain going up and down it; my back is aching like I’m in labor; and I have a headache behind me eye that is traveling to the back of my head. The good news, my first ever biopsy came back negative this week (thank you God!), and tomorrow I get a 24 hour break from the antibiotics. So, that calls for a celebration! 1 Corinthians 10:31 – Whether therefore ye eat, or drink, or whatsoever ye do, do all to the glory of God. There may be question as to whether my pain is in my head or in my bones, but there will never be a question in my mind about how much God loves me. He will always be there for me and help me. . . All I have to do is call out to Him. If you’re going through a rough patch, wondering how much more of this pain or chaos you can handle, just reach out to Jesus. He’s the only one who can cure. No prescription, no medical device nor therapy can compare to the power of HIS name!
It’s been quite some time since I last posted. I’ve been struggling with what to say and trying to tie it into some sort of biblical life lesson, when all I wanted to do was just live my life. Every time I thought about writing, I felt like time was better spend with the kids or hubby or working. But I feel like it’s my calling to write and I know that Lyme, Autism and Alzheimers are issues that millions of people face everyday and I need to continue to share my journey, whether good, bad, inspirational or even boring!
So, the reason I chose today to start writing again is because I started a new Lyme treatment this morning. I’ve been off my meds for a week (trying to give my liver a break – normal ALT levels range from 7 to 55 units per liter – mine was 107). Needless to say, taking antibiotics for over a year tends to take a toll on your body. It was a beautiful thing not having to chug over 20 pills every morning while getting the kids off to school.
Unfortunately, break time is over. I didn’t have to take nearly as many pills as I was used to taking – but I did have to take three antibiotics at once. This petrifies me. The last time we tried this, I landed in bed with intense migraines and excruciating pain from head to toe. We gave up and cut back to two antibiotics.
One of the reasons Lyme is so difficult to treat is because the bacteria and their co-infections have the ability to hide under a gooey sticky covering called a biofilm. When you think you’ve killed them all off, you find out they were just hiding out in this biofilm long enough for you to think they’re dead and gone, then they re-emerge and re-infect you all over again. It’s a vicious cycle. Most medications and herbs have a difficult time penetrating this shield, which is why Lyme is so incredibly difficult to treat. My doctor’s plan this time is to use this triple threat of antibiotics to get through the Lyme force field.
I’ve been doing much better these past few months. So, I was actually thinking that at my last doctor visit he would tell me to stop all meds, continue the vitamins & supplements and basically suck it up – because this is as good as it gets. But to my surprise he’s going full speed ahead. Maybe this will be the one? Maybe this triplet threat will actually kill the lyme once and for all?
Maybe. . . . maybe not. But either way I keep chugging along. As we finish up our taxes, it becomes very real how much Lyme has affected not only my body and my ability to function as a wife, mom and marketing manager — it has also put us deeper into debt than I thought was possible. But I know that somehow God will provide . . . not only financially but emotionally. He will provide the strength I need to get through these next few weeks — that (if the medication works) should be very intense. But just like Lyme has their sticky biofilm to protect them, I have the biggest, toughest force field of all . . . Jesus! He will protect me from anything this world can throw my way. I just have to remember to ask for help 🙂